Skip to main content

Originally published August 25, 2012 at 4:24 PM | Page modified August 25, 2012 at 8:15 PM

  • Share:
  • Comments (0)
  • Print

They said what? All-time funny coaching quotes

Here are a few all-time funny coaching quotes.

Most Popular Comments
Hide / Show comments
No comments have been posted to this article.
Start the conversation >


Not every coach has the boring, "we're taking it one game at a time" personality. Some, like Mike Leach, aren't afraid to tell you the truth. Here are a few all-time funny coaching quotes.

"We didn't tackle well today but we made up for it by not blocking."

— John McKay, USC

"The only qualifications for a lineman are to be big and dumb. To be a back, you only have to be dumb."

— Knute Rockne, Notre Dame

"At Georgia Southern, we don't cheat. That costs money and we don't have any."

— Erk Russell, Georgia Southern

"Three things can happen when you pass the ball, and two of them are bad."

— Woody Hayes, Ohio State

"I had a lifetime contract, but the administration declared me dead."

— Frank Howard, Clemson

"Football is not a contact sport, it is a collision sport. Dancing is a contact sport."

— Duffy Daugherty, Michigan State

"Always remember ... Goliath was a 40-point favorite over David."

— Shug Jordan, Auburn

"I don't want to win enough to be placed on NCAA probation, I just want to win enough to warrant an investigation."

— Bob Devaney, Nebraska

"If lessons are learned in defeat, our team is getting a great education."

— Murray Warmath, Minnesota

"Lads, you're not to miss practice unless your parents died or you died."

— Frank Leahy, Notre Dame

Relive the magic

Relive the magic

Shop for unique souvenirs highlighting great sports moments in Seattle history.