Being an insufferably eternal optimist, Mr. Wrap has high expectations of our leaders, which sometimes can lead to hasty judgments.
The truth is, if we all knew what really goes down behind the scenes, we’d probably be less quick to judge. Last week, for example, you might have thought a governor possessing even the smallest of stones would have been out cracking the whip to solve infuriating public problems, such as a downtown tunnel project stymied by an idiotic labor/management snafu; a ferry system nearly crippled by bogus absenteeism; and more pre-cracked pontoons being towed to the Evergreen Point Floating Cost Overrun.
But The Guv can’t be everywhere at once. Before you label him AWOL, understand that he was, at the very same time, announcing a critical new initiative — “Results Washington,” a process to facilitate public opinion about creating a “more effective and efficient” state government.
It’s high time people accepted the fact that you can’t solve big problems and properly visualize big-problem solutions all in the same 40-hour week.
More form trumping substance:
Are You Ready For Some Replays? Apparently NBC is adding up to 25 percent more cameras than usual to document the Seahawks / 49ers game. Let’s hope they’re not all at elevation 5,000 feet, like the camera positions in new Husky Stadium.
Speaking of the Big Game: The headline read: “Don’t assault that 49ers fan: He or she might actually be a cop.” To which colleague Jim Brunner added helpfully, via Twitter: “Also because it’s wrong.”
Sad News: We have made several phone calls and regrettably can confirm that yes, the Mariners are still playing.
Actual 2013 Seattle Mariners Ad Slogan: “Mariners’ Baseball: True to the Blue.”
Suggested 2014 Seattle Mariners Ad Slogan: “Mariners’ Baseball: Containing the Suckage.”
Fear the Rut: The elk population in Kittitas County might actually exceed the human population of Ellensburg, the Ellensburg Daily Record reports, noting that the state has documented 18,000 of the beasts living in the county. And to think: Those are just the ones that filled out the census.
Rut Deux: Fortunately elk/human relations are sound. Last time we drove through Cle Elum, we noted several hundred elk playing Tuesday Night Bingo at the local Benevolent and Protective Order of the Humans Hall.
The Week’s Shocking Development: The conniving liars who run the NBA say hedge funder Chris Hansen’s conniving lying in the Sacramento Kings debacle not only will not hurt his chances of obtaining a future NBA franchise but could make him chairman of the league’s experimental new ethics committee.
Shocking II: Unfortunately for Hansen, the largest political damage from his duplicitous attempt to undo a public/private partnership in a city where he doesn’t live is likely to be felt in the other city he’s attempting to hornswoggle.
And Finally: Imagine our dismay upon learning that the Seattle City Council’s new focus on “business recycling” is just a push for businesses to recycle more waste, not the recycling of businesses themselves. It just seemed like such perfect symmetry to have a chance to make compost from Comcast.
Ron Judd’s column appears each Sunday. Reach him at firstname.lastname@example.org or 206-464-8280. Twitter: @roncjudd.
About The Wrap / Ron Judd
"The Wrap" appears on Sundays, highlighting the absurd and providing the punch line to the week's news headlines.